"Whampee"

Memorial for Dawn

2007-09-30T20:21:00.001-07:00

Hello Friends,

I would like to welcome you all to remember and celebrate Dawn Phelps McConnell's life!

Saturday October 6, 2007
Beneath the St. John's Bridge, Cathedral Park
Near the Dock
12:30pm
Rain or Shine!

Followed by a reception at Cassidy's
Around 1:30pm
Light appetizers/snacks

We will be releasing some small boats down the river with our good-byes, thoughts, wishes, poems, whatever. Feel free to write or draw something ahead of time, or we'll have supplies to do it there.

I am trying to get an idea of how many people we should be expecting. Please email me if you are think you'll attend. Thanks so much! I'm looking forward to seeing you, and I'm looking forward to a celebration of an amazing woman!

Sincerely,
Kristin

Gratitude

2007-09-26T21:30:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking a lot about gratitude lately. I think it's a concept that I forget the power of. I suppose sometimes it can be overused and insincere. But I've been smacked in the face with gratitude every time I turn around these last months. I find that especially interesting, because when I began this journey last spring, I was VERY angry. So angry I could hardly see straight. Not one bit of this was fair or just or right. I still get angry; however, now I'm -yes- grateful for the anger. It is what propels me forward sometimes. Just when I want to crawl under my blankets and stay there - anger reminds me that I have to DO something to make a difference.

I've said over and over how amazed I am at the responses of Dawn's friends and family during this time. The selfless giving of time, work, food, kind words, prayers, and money has been stunning. Dawn has felt lifted up and so grateful! And, I see now that all this generosity is our way of expressing our enormous gratitude to/for Dawn and how she has impacted our lives and made the world a little more beautiful.

I've always been grateful for my relationship with Dawn, and I hope that I have let her know that from time to time along the way. But I have learned that I still have a lot to learn about being grateful in the moment- being grateful for each and every phone conversation or breakfast date, no matter how ordinary. I have learned that I have a responsibility to those I care about to be really present and grateful at every turn. I'll try to do better.

So today, as I begin to mend my aching heart, I will be forever grateful to Dawn for her funny, loving way. I will be forever grateful to her family for allowing me to walk this last, difficult marathon with her. I will be forever grateful to my family and friends who shared the burden with me so I was never alone.

Kristin

Good Bye, My Friend

2007-09-25T18:55:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends,

Dawn Alene Phelps McConnell died this evening just after 5:30 pm. She was 49 years old.

She was surrounded by her dear friends and family who, like you, love her very much. Her final 24 hours alternated between quiet peace and discomfort. She was very brave and beautiful and graceful.

I will write more soon.

With love,
Kristin

One Foot Elsewhere

2007-09-18T14:57:00.000-07:00

It's time for an update on Dawn's current status.

The hospice nurse visited a couple of days ago and told Dawn's family that she has entered what they call the "active dying" phase. She has been spending less and less time awake. It seems that she has one foot in this world and one foot elsewhere. She is very comfortable and peaceful. The nurse also indicated that this phase is not a long one, and Dawn may only be with us for a few more days or a week.

I will certainly keep you posted. Please keep Dawn and her family in your prayers.

Kristin

A Message From Dawn's Family

2007-09-13T17:42:00.001-07:00

Dear Friends,

Dawn's illness seems to be bringing her close to her journey's end now, and she has recently been started on a morphine pump which has helped keep her more comfortable. The first day on morphine, she was comfortable enough to sit up and paint just a little as you can see in the picture. As her disease claims her body, her angelic smile and beauty still shine through her face. She has good days where she's very lucid and her mind is very sharp and then she has bad days where we lose her to the disease and the drugs.

I know a lot of you would like to say a few words to her to express your love and support and it just isn't possible for her to have visitors, but we've come up with a way for you to get her a personal message. You can call my cell phone 503-701-9042 between the hours of 9:00 PM and whenever at night - I'll just put it where I cannot hear it after 9:00 PM - and you can call and leave her a message. Then I can play them for her and she can hear your voice and your words. I know it's not the same as being able to touch her and speak with her, but...

Again, thank you all. Words cannot express our thanks and the love we send out to all of you for your support and your love for Dawn.

Sincerely, MaryBeth (sister) on behalf of the rest of the Phelps family; Robyn and Harold (parents), and Lynda and Susie and Lee (other sibs).

An Event to Remember

2007-09-13T08:31:00.001-07:00

The amazing, wonderful benefit for Dawn was such an enormous success! Thanks to so much hard work, donations, and hundreds of attendees, we exceeded our wildest expectations! The benefit brought in $8471! This is an enormous showing of love and generosity from Dawn-lovers, art-lovers, and their friends.

A very special thank you to Pam Nichols who had this idea and made it happen in very short order. Pam, this event might never have happened if left to me. I sincerely appreciate your willingness to take it on! And your attention to every detail. It was wonderful!

I send another very special thank you to Tracy Dana and Jerry Fechter, Dawn's next door neighbors and friends. Thank you for your very generous assistance and tireless work to arrange the location, food and drink. Please give my thanks to the Lucky Lab also!!

I am also overwhelmed by the amount of BEAUTIFUL art that was donated for auction and sale. These pieces were stunning, and gave the auction such depth! Thank you artists!

Thanks also to the legions of volunteers that showed up to help set up and clean up, took money, and made the whole thing flow as smoothly as it did.

And of course, thank you, thank you, thank you to the hundreds of people who arrived on a Friday evening with their checkbooks in hand and bought things. Thank you for inviting your friends, family, and coworkers. Thank you.

I had the pleasure of telling Dawn about the success of the benefit the next morning. She was speechless. Her mother was covered in goosebumps. It's a beautiful thing to help someone. I hope you all can carry that glow with you for awhile.

Besides the fact that the benefit was a HUGE success. I thought it was also a lot of fun. It was wonderful to meet many of the people I've been communicating by email with lately. I also enjoyed sharing "Dawn Stories" with many of you. It made me happy (and Dawn too) that it was not a tearful event, but a joyous one. Dawn is an amazing person, and now I see so clearly how amazing people attract amazing people - and LOTS OF THEM! I hope to post photos here soon. Please send them to me if you have any!!

I know many of you have been waiting to get an update on Dawn's health. I am overdue to provide one. It keeps getting harder to write this part. But here goes... Dawn has been experiencing a lot of muscular pain. It's possible that it's from being in bed so much, but it may also be the cancer - we don't know. As a result, she has been trying to control the pain with massage, acupuncture, and pain medication. She still wasn't comfortable, however, so her doctors have prescribed morphine. This has actually been a great thing for two reasons. First, her pain is definitely more under control now, and secondly she is less groggy than she was when she was using all the other pain meds.

Dawn continues to get weaker though, and her body is not cooperating as well as it used to. Occasionally she finds a small burst of energy - the other day I set up some of her paints and brushes for her - hoping she'd paint a bit. She bossed me around for awhile, "I need better light. I need more brushes. I need burnt sienna and jenkins green." By the time we had everything in place, she needed a nap. I think she was loving it, though. I'm hoping she'll try again today.

Many of you have asked about visiting her. She has asked her family to stop visitors now. It is very exhausting and emotional for her to see all the visitors that want to come by. She is being read her emails and the messages from the blog by her sister. She is also being read cards and letters that arrive in the mail. She loves all of those things very much!

I would like to refill the schedule with some home cooked meals. Dawn's mother has told me several times that is really makes a difference for her not to have to worry about what she is going to feed herself, her husband, and Dawn's sister, Mary Beth. Please email me if you would like to get on the upcoming schedule for delivering a meal to them.

Sincerest thanks to you all for all you have done and continue to do,
Kristin
kkellyknits@gmail.com

A Benefit for Dawn McConnell

2007-08-29T09:23:00.001-07:00

I'm excited to invite you all to a Benefit for Dawn McConnell! It will be Friday Sept. 7th from 5:30 until 9:00 at the NW location of the Lucky Lab (1945 NW Quimby).

Dawn's friend and fellow artist, Pam Nichols, in conjunction with many other friends and neighbors, is planning a silent auction to benefit Dawn. This is SO important, as Dawn has been unable to work for many months, and you can imagine how mountainous her medical bills have been.

Some of Dawn's work will be available for sale as well as artwork donated by several other artists. There will be food, drink, and a wonderful opportunity for us all to get together and share stories about our beloved friend, Dawn.

PLEASE share this flyer (right click on the image and save it to your own computer to print out) with anyone you know who appreciates art or Dawn or both.

I know that Pam is looking for some helpers with setting up, cleaning up, serving, etc. I believe she will also need some additional donations of different kinds (gift certificates, etc.). Please email her if you would be available to help in ANY way. The success of this event depends on having plenty of helpers, donations, and attendees. Her email is razapam@gmail.com

Thanks very much! See you there!

A Message From Myrna

2007-08-20T16:24:00.000-07:00

Greetings All,

As Dawn moves through this next phase of her journey, I know that many of you may be wanting to reach out, and may feel disconnected if you can't visit or call. I want to encourage each of you to use the blog to start sharing stories and thoughts about Dawn and what she means to you. This will be a gift in two ways. First, Dawn and her family can visit there and read about how much love is out there for Dawn. Secondly, it will help all of us to feel connected to each other. The people that love Dawn and are loved by Dawn come from a lot of different places in her life. It is nice to have a place where all of us can come together in celebration of Dawn.

Now, I know that many of us have never used and blog and it, frankly, is outside of our comfort zone. So, have courage, it is not hard. At the bottom of this posting is a small word - "comments." You drag your cursor onto that word and click on it. It will take you to another page where you can read what comments are there. If you want to leave a story or comment yourself, you will see a box in which to type it. Underneath the comment box are three buttons. Click the button marked "other." Enter your name beneath that. That is it. When you are satisfied with your comment, just hit the "publish" button and it will be added to the other comments. If you are getting this, I know that you "do" email, which means you can blog! Isn't that exciting!

So I invite each of you to use it to connect with Dawn and each other.

Keep up the prayers and the loving thoughts. If you want to join in the prayer circle, we will be meeting this coming Saturday, August 25, 10 -11 a.m., at my office, 2225 N.E. Alberta St. Suite C, Portland, OR 97211. If you have questions, please feel free to call me, 503-281-6015.

Love,
Myrna Yoder

A Band of Angels

2007-08-20T16:22:00.000-07:00

I am sorry to report that Dawn is not regaining her strength as we hoped she might. She has continued to weaken. Hospice has been AMAZING. I have often said that it's like a band of angels descended on that house the day the Hospice nurses arrived. Dawn's mother told me that the Hospice doctor should have a set of wings, too. They have worked tirelessly to adjust Dawn's medications, assist with daily tasks, and allow Dawn to have wonderful moments, such as getting out to smell her roses, taking a leisurely bath, and having a massage.

I believe that she is making peace with all that is happening to her. It's all come on so quickly, and I know it's difficult for her (or any of us) to accept. She is handling it with such grace and humor and honest emotion.

Loving the Cards and Letters

2007-08-13T19:45:00.001-07:00

Dawn's family has asked me to post this note.

Dawn LOVES to receive all of your good wishes. It makes her feel so loved and supported during this time. She and her family are feeling a little overwhelmed by the number of phone calls and visitors, however.

She is reading emails (although not responding), and she loves the cards she receives in the mail. You are also welcome to leave messages on this blog - they are more public, though.

I am sure that there will come a time when phone calls and visits will be more appropriate, but right now Dawn needs the uninterrupted rest that will help restore her energy.

As soon as things change, I'll post a note here!
Thank you,
Kristin

Every Step of The Way...

2007-08-11T13:03:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends of Dawn,

This latest update is a tough one to write -- and will be hard to read too. Our friend Dawn has reached a crossroads in her cancer. She recently received the results from a scan indicating that she has more tumors than ever. This means that the chemotherapy was not doing what we all hoped it would. And, since the therapy was making her sick and weak, she has decided to discontinue chemo and try to gain some of her strength back. She will continue to pursue some alternative treatments, however her first goal is regaining her strength.

Her doctor ordered hospice for Dawn (Dawn prefers to call it "Home Health.") They have been wonderful! They brought her an adjustable bed, oxygen, a wheelchair (for walks around the block), and a real focus on her medication and how to minimize her ever-present nausea. Their goal is to make Dawn as comfortable as possible! This is a blessing for her family members who were feeling overwhelmed with the task of trying to keep her comfortable.

So you may ask, what about our miracle? What about the love and energy we have poured toward Dawn? I still keep the miracle of Dawn's restored health in my heart and hopes. And Dawn is surrounded by the miracle of totally accepting the abundant love of her family and her friends. She has acquaintances and people who don't even know her praying for her. All that love and prayer and energy has helped Dawn in every way.

What about visiting now? We all know how much Dawn loves people and talking, but we also know she needs lots of rest. Even though she can't have legions of visitors, Dawn loves to hear from folks---cards, email, a little surprise on her doorstep.

In addition, our help is still needed with home cooked meals - and help picking up her prescriptions as needed (located at Adventist Hospital - 102nd and Gladstone). Please send me an email you would like to be on either of these lists.

We can also continue to support Dawn with gardening and taking Murphy for walks whenever you're in the neighborhood. Stay tuned for ways we can help financially as well.

I don't know where this path is leading Dawn, but she knows we are all beside her - and loving her - every step of the way.

Sincerely,
Kristin Kelly
kkellyknits@gmail.com

Overdue Update

2007-07-25T13:16:00.000-07:00

Sorry it's been so long since the last post. Here is an update on Dawn's health, upcoming events, requests for help, and more.

Dawn's Health
Dawn has received two chemotherapy treatments. She'll receive one or two more treatments before they assess her progress and make a continuing plan. She is tolerating chemo pretty well. As is common, she has been pretty nauseous and dehydrated. She continues to sport a full head of hair and a positive attitude! She was approved for Medicaid and Food Stamps, and she was accepted as a member of the Oregon Health Plan. This is a huge relief! She will continue to work toward Social Security benefits as well. She continues to be so thankful for all the support she has felt from all.

Upcoming Events
Dawn's friend, Shelly Pittman, is organizing what we hope will be a powerful healing event for Dawn! She is calling it Dawn's Good Thought-a-Thon. The purpose of this event is to focus concentrated healing prayer/energy on Dawn for 48 continuous hours starting Friday, 7/27, at 10:00pm and ending Sunday, 7/29, at 10:00pm. Shelly is asking that we all participate by committing to a 1/2-hour time slot on two consecutive days. Your time will be spent at your own home. There is lots more information in the post below this one or email Shelly directly at shellypittman@comcast.net

In addition to the Good Thought-a-Thon, we are continuing our Prayer Circle every other Saturday morning. Updated times and dates are at right.

Requests for Help
Thanks to everyone who responded to me with offers of help! Dawn's family has been so grateful for the assistance. I am still looking for a few rides and meals in the coming weeks. Please let me know if you can be a driver or a cook for one of the following dates.

Wednesday, August 1, 3:30pm - Fluid replacement appointment (approx 2.5 hours)
Friday, August 3, 11:00am - Fluid replacement appointment (approx 2.5 hours)
Week of August 12-18 - Meal Delivery once sometime during this week
Week of August 19-25 - Meal Delivery once sometime during this week
Week of August 26-Sept 1 - Meal Delivery once sometime during this week.

If you happen to live close by, please feel free to putter around in Dawn's garden or take Murphy out for a little exercise! And don't hesitate to contact Dawn at mailto:pdbuffalo@juno.com

Sincerely,
Kristin Kelly
kkellyknits@gmail.com

A Message From Shelly Pittman

2007-07-25T12:19:00.000-07:00

GOOD-THOUGHT-A-THON for DAWN
starting Friday, 7/27, at 10PM – ending Sunday, 7/29, at 10PM

Hello,
The intention of these 48 hours of continuous meditation / prayer / highest thoughts is to work with Dawn in a concentrated way to help her achieve her goal: Complete healing through fully and comfortably utilizing the chemo and other therapies she’s receiving, releasing the cancer, and rebuilding her energetic system.

Please choose a half hour that you can dedicate at the same time on each of the two days. Those of you who choose the hours between midnight and 6am have special thanks! Should more than one person speak for the same time period, that’s great, we just need to have every half hour covered by at least one person. If the unexpected arises and you can’t cover both days, it will be greatly appreciated if you ask one of your friends or family to work with Dawn at your designated time.

Asking for, sharing and sending vital energy and love to Dawn, and seeing the light of healing spreading far out around her are just a few ideas for the form your gift could take. Of course, whatever is in your mind and heart to send is by far the best.

Due to Dawn’s reduced immune response, we’re doing this remotely rather than in-person. By way of inspiration, imagination and intention we’ll connect with her and one another in a powerful way.

Please email or call in your preferred time to shellypittman@comcast.net or 503.309.4584. If you’re able to be flexible, please list your first and second time choices and leave your phone number so your specific time can be confirmed. Please respond by Thursday evening, 7/26.

Dawn said she guessed the good-thought-a-thon meant she shouldn’t run around, eat a bunch of ice cream and drink a lot of beer this coming weekend. Nice to know she’ll be doing her part, eh?!

Many thanks and blessings to all.

Available Times (only available times are shown here):
1:30pm-2pm Saturday & Sunday
2pm-2:30pm Saturday & Sunday
4:30pm-5pm Saturday & Sunday
5:30pm-6pm Saturday & Sunday

Circle of Love

2007-07-10T12:54:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday was our first Prayer Circle for Dawn. I would like to extend a very special thank you to Myrna for sharing her space and especially for guiding our combined visions and energies toward our common focus.

I'm also so thankful to all of amazing women who were present, and all the men and women who were praying for her from wherever they happened to be. Dawn is overwhelmed by the love and support she is feeling. She says often what a tremendous gift it's been to watch her friends and family come together in a new way!

Speaking of circles of love... Dawn has been doing some visualization of her own. She has a new charm necklace that goes wherever she does! It is a beautiful silver chain adorned with about 20 significant charms. Some were gifts from cherished friends or family members, one is an earring of a beloved cousin, even a lock of her own hair! These charms symbolize all the gifts cancer has brought her, and her desire to live! The necklace hangs over her whole chest - where the cancer dwells - to remind the cancer that there is no room for it! One charm is a quirky little cherubic angel with a heart in her hands. Dawn likes to imagine that the angel is flying around inside her and carrying the tumors out.

As for an update on Dawn's health, she is feeling pretty good today. She did a little gardening and went on a small outing to Knitting Circle (another circle, hmm). She had a very rough couple of days during the weekend, though. She just couldn't get the nausea under control. And, as a result, she became dehydrated. I believe the nausea is the hardest part of this for Dawn. It feels scary and out of control. She was able to get a new prescription that is keeping it under control this week, though. Yeah! This prescription cost about $700 - but worth every penny if it works!

Along those lines, Dawn was approved for Food Stamps and Medicaid. They (Dawn and her sister, Mary Beth) are applying for Medicare and a prescription plan next. Mary Beth has been managing most of this, since Dawn is a little groggy from all the meds.

Thank you to those who emailed me offering to help. I will be responding today and tomorrow with some requests, scheduling options, etc. Also, we will be continuing the Prayer for Dawn every other Saturday at the same time (see the calendar at right for the next date and time).

A Message From Myrna Yoder

2007-07-05T11:23:00.000-07:00

Greetings All,

If you are reading this, then you are connected to our lovely sister, daughter, friend, Dawn. You also know that she is beginning her journey with cancer.

I am writing to invite you to join me in supporting Dawn through the spiritual practice of prayer. We will gather to send Grace and Healing to her.

On the first Saturday of July, (July 7th) I will be opening my space on Alberta, for a prayer gathering from 10 a.m. to 11 a.m. There will be no program. It will be simply a coming together and a focusing on sitting with Dawn, the Divine and being channels for Grace.

Most of the hour will be spent in silence, so as to practice prayer in the way that respects each of our spiritual traditions.

Questions? Please feel free to contact me. 503-281-6015

If you know of anyone who would like to participate, please feel free to pass this on to them.

Blessing of Grace to you,
Myrna Yoder
spiritual director
grace paths

Dear Friends of Dawn

2007-07-04T11:43:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends of Dawn,

As you probably know by now, Dawn's health has been of great concern. She was finally able to secure a diagnosis. I'm afraid the news is not good. She has cancer in its fourth stage. Its origin is unknown, but has spread to occupy her lungs and liver. This means she is in for a difficult time over the coming months.

Dawn's approach is that she is ready for the fight! I am too. But how can I help? It's been hard for me to know how best to help her wonderful parents, sisters and brother during this time. I know each of you wants to help somehow too. So, with Dawn and her family, I've worked on a list of a variety of ways that we can assist. Of course, Dawn is equally grateful if you are able to send any prayers, good thoughts, cosmic energy - whatever you happen to have to offer.

In addition to all the work ahead for Dawn's recovery, there is also the matter of Dawn's financial survival. Dawn is one of America's gifted artists who, because the cost is totally prohibitive, is uninsured. The American health care system has completely let her down. It let her down several years ago, when she first noticed some sensitivities in her stomach - but couldn't afford to go to the doctor. It let her down again and again as she talked herself out of needing the help of a costly physician, even though her symptoms were troubling. And, it's letting her down now as she waits too long to see an oncologist and is asked to do mountains of paperwork at a time when she is scarcely able to make herself a sandwich.

So...(excuse me while I step down from my soapbox), I believe, we can work together to help Dawn in the immediate future with an online auction of some of Dawn's artwork (more details to follow). We can help with a Prayer Circle (see details at right). And we can help with warm meals, with rides, with good wishes. I will be emailing you the list of ways we can take some of the burden off her family.

Furthermore, I believe we can work together to help change this broken system - Let's start by contacting our senators and letting them know how we feel about this issue. Addresses, phone numbers and web links are on this page.

If you would like to contact Dawn, feel free to do so! She would love to hear from you. She will be monitoring (and even contributing) to this blog. So, send your wishes here or to her email at pdbuffalo@juno.com

Many thanks,
Kristin Kelly
kkellyknits@gmail.com